Hanging around in the lost and found

I've been unable to look at a computer much recently due to sinusitis headaches, and in this time I seem to have drifted somewhat from where I want to be. So this blog is me re-focussing. It might take a few days though, depending on how bad my headache gets (it's just one long headache now that gets worse sometimes).

My running goal
I think 2 months have now passed since I last ran for any length of time. This doesn't particularly worry me as the positive consequence is that my horrendous joint pain has gone away. What does concern me is that my activity levels have pretty much dropped to zero. Aside from essential walking, like getting to work and to the chemist, I have done precisely nothing. For some reason, the thought of leaving the house triggers a reaction of exhaustion. On a logical level, I know that this is bad. Not doing any exercise tends to lead to yet more lethargy and the longer I live like this, the worse it will get. What I need is to rediscover my love of the outdoors. One of the things that most excited me about getting a car was the thought that we could walk in new places. We're lucky enough to have a really nice round trip just 2 minutes away, but it's always an option of which way round and it gets boring.

The solution, I feel, is to force myself out a few times and hopefully the desire will return. Another option that I've been looking at is becoming a volunteer for a Cerebral Palsy group. They meet on a Thursday morning (my day off) and take a group of disabled adults on a walk. This would mean I would have to do it every week (or however often the walks are) in all weathers and I would be helping people who otherwise wouldn't have the opportunity. My concern is that I have zero experience of CP and on a more practical level, I would have to buy walking shoes (it said so in the advert). Making decisions like this scare me and bring out my inner pessimist. Pretty much my first thought was, "What if I'm ill and can't make it one week? What if I don't like it and then feel obliged to continue? What if I'm not even fit enough to manage the walk?"

We'll see anyway. I do feel like I do nothing to help anyone but myself. I am naturally quite a selfish person but that doesn't mean I have to act that way all of the time.

My Striving to Learn goal

This has been greatly helped recently by lots of excellent TV. I've always loved TV for its ability to force information into me that I otherwise would never have learned. Stephen Fry's documentary about Wagner is a prime example. I know nothing about classical music or opera, or indeed Wagner. Or to be more precise, I knew nothing. Now I know a little. And as a tiny consequence, when I was flipping through channels later in the week and came upon the Marriage of Figaro, I didn't immediately flip past. Admittedly, I didn't watch the whole thing, but that was more to do with the fact that I had missed half of it and felt it deserved more. I did watch for a while though and really enjoyed it. I'm also loving the sudden rush of Science programmes on the BBC. Everyone knows the name Newton, but I had no idea he was such an arse, or that his Principia may never have been published if it weren't for Halley (the guy with the comet). And who knew that Christopher Wren once cut out a dog's spleen or that Boyle killed a bird in a vacuum? I really do love learning things, even if I forget them the next day. Which reminds me, my penpal has been revising high school maths and he mentioned multiplying and dividing fractions. I realised that I have forgotten how to do it. I remember subtracting and adding but have no idea how to multiply. So that's something to do this week. As for new skills in the further future, I'm getting a little anxious. It seems that every year the beginners woodwork course is on a Monday night. I work one Monday night every 3 weeks, which means I would either have to miss a third of the course, book as many of those nights off as possible, or try to convince a colleague to swap a Monday with a Wednesday. The first option is crap, the second impossible and the third highly unlikely. I suppose I shouldn't worry until I know when the course is (please be on a Thursday).

Plans for this week

In order to get myself a bit more sorted, today I will tidy my room. It isn't atrociously messy, but it's getting there, and I do find that a tidy room helps towards a tidy mind. Tomorrow, my boyfriend is driving me to Jodrell Bank and if we have time, we can go for a wander in Alderley Edge too. It will get me out of the house and I get to see a 3D film. Hopefully all the kids on half term won't have the same idea. Then on Thursday the plan is just to get on the treadmill and see what happens. My lungs have been awful recently and it can't just be coincidence that I haven't done any exercise. And then back to work on Friday where I will hopefully come to a decision as to when to hold my inter-library quiz. We never meet socially with other libraries and I thought it would be fun. My usual outlook would be that someone else would be better at planning it than me and probably nobody will come, but actually, I'm pretty good at planning things and if only 5 people come, I haven't lost anything.